Expert Advice: Promises Kept

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Commitment is probably the most misunderstood word in the English language. It isn't just about hanging in there. In marriage we agree to give ourselves completely to another person.

Commitment calls us to have real character. You have made a sacred promise—in sickness and in health. People who keep such promises experience life at a deeper level. David Hubbard, president of Fuller Seminary, was one of the greatest spiritual leaders I ever knew. He didn't talk about it much, but his wife was an invalid. He shared her illness with her. He helped her live a full life, and I think the experience was at the root of his own quiet strength.

We don't tell single people enough about the true commitment. They should know what kind of promise they're making when they wed. It isn't conditional. In a marriage two people tell each other, "I belong to you and you belong to me no matter what." It's what the sacredness of marriage is about.

Neil Clark Warren, PhD, is chairman and co-founder of eHarmony.com.

This article originally appeared in Guideposts magazine. Visit the recently updated guideposts.com today.